The Write Gardener

Deer Me!

After reading an article by Scott Paulsen in last Saturday’s Valley News Dispatch (Living, “We’re raising us up a bumper crop of deer,” 3/14/2009) I consider myself to be one very lucky gardener. Maybe you should too; consider Mr. Paulsen’s plight: “The other night, after work, I rounded the big bend, headed toward the farmhouse and was greeted by BambiPalooza ’09. At least two dozen young deer were picnicking in our front yard.” Some of you will remember Scott Paulsen from his days at WDVE, a popular FM radio station in Pittsburgh, where he co-hosted the Morning Show with fellow DJ Jim Krenn. Paulsen left the show in 2000 to “search for adventures in far-off and mysterious places.” Evidently, he found an adventure that’s kept him more than occupied for the past nine years or so.

Paulsen lives and gardens (or tries to garden) on a farm somewhere in western PA which puts him in the same general area we call home. And, forgive me for saying this Scott, but I hope and pray your deer problem doesn’t migrate in a direction which might lead it to Grove City or Mercer. I haven’t seen deer in my backyard yet, but of course that doesn’t mean they’re not lurking. After reading about Paulsen’s deer problems, I found it interesting that I don’t hear similar complaints around here. If y’all do complain, perhaps you do so under your breath after accepting the fact that there’s not much you can do about it.

Garden writers, and ex-DJs who take up writing, have an outlet: newsprint. Again, consider Mr. Paulsen’s onerous words: “The sawed-off 10-gauge sprays pretty wide. Even a crazed country gardener, shouting insults his Italian grandmother taught him, probably would hit three or four, teaching the whole hoofed crew a lesson.” In his next paragraph, Mr. Paulsen lets his readers know he wouldn’t dare do such a thing: “I thought better of it after I realized that, out here, we’re all responsible for our own messes.” Unless you’ve read the piece, the “mess” Paulsen refers to is better left to the imagination.

Scott Paulsen’s intentions, of course, is to seek help from readers about what he might do to prevent deer from eating “everything in sight, including vegetables, shrubs, trees and all the plants your local gardening center lists as ‘deer-proof.’” Paulsen says there’s no such thing as a “deer-proof” plant in Western Pennsylvania. I’ve not tried them all, but most of the perennials and shrubs we have in our garden seem impervious to hoofed herbivores. I wonder what Scott has growing (or has tried growing) in his landscape?

Or maybe there’s some truth to that “bumper crop of deer” idea. Maybe deer are evolving into some type of super species of animal. Maybe they are adjusting to conditions caused by the ever increasing need we humans have for more room. Maybe there’s no place left for deer to just be deer so they’re evolving into an animal with new survival instincts. Instincts that are now giving them an appetite for our landscape plants. Wouldn’t that make sense? I think it does. I also think it shows man’s hubris if we believe we should have more of this or that. It’s precisely what’s gotten us into the economic crisis we’re in right now.
But this isn’t a political or business column, it’s a gardening column. So shouldn’t I be writing about gardening? Yes and no. Gardening is part of what makes us human, but we’re also largely influenced by what’s happening outside the garden gates as well. And sometimes I feel the need to take a little extra liberty here to step up on the proverbial podium and send out a little reminder. Not only to you, but to myself also. A reminder that says there are others, deer included, that have an equal right to go about their daily lives in peace and happiness. Whether or not you believe critters experience happiness as humans do is irrelevant as far as I’m concerned, it’s the principal folks.

Spring officially arrives Friday, that’s the day after tomorrow. It’s not just around the corner anymore and we’ll probably start getting our hands dirty on a weekly, if not daily, basis. And as in past gardening seasons, we’re all likely to see some pest or critter that rankles our nerves and gives us reason to reach for that bag of pesticide or a “sawed-off 10-gauge.” But let us have restraint, let us see reason that Nature does what she does on her own terms, not ours. Let us garden with our hearts as well as our hands and I can guarantee that you’ll have a more enjoyable, and perhaps even more successful, growing season.

Gardening Tips

Remember this simple experiment that will let you know if your soil is dry enough for planting – scoop a handful, roll it into a ball, drop it from chest height, if it crumbles after hitting the ground it’s dry enough for planting.

Start thinking about repotting your houseplants. You should repot at least every other year, depending on how your plant is doing. Some houseplants don’t mind crowded roots, others will need larger pots as they grow. You can also start adding small doses of slow release liquid or solid fertilizer, go with the organic stuff if you can afford it.

Seed starters, once you have new sprouts, move them under the grow lights for at least 12 to 15 hours of light per day.

Want a perennial shrub with yellow flowers blooming in your house right now? Then go out and cut a few forsythia branches. Choose branches with plenty of new buds, smash the ends of cut stems, stick them in a vase and let yellow flowers bring you a happy start to spring.

tc@thewritegardener.com